Thinking again

Well I ended up with 4 more of the winter squash cooked up last night here in the household since I was frustrated about yesterday morning.  Since my Husband will not stop at all while he is driving so I can get out and try to cut the pain down and start somewhat walking for nickles I paid for it totally.  After all said and done here if I see one nickle there is about a dollars worth right there almost on top of the one of course and I could not say anything about it since I will always be in the wrong with some people.  With that being said in what all went wrong yesterday did and now I almost wished that I stayed home to get to the laundry here for the place.  Now I will be on over load for today here to get things done of course and there is no turning back on that part of things now.  So as I sit here and think of all the things that need to be done here in my household at this time and I will be the only one that will be doing of course here it is ok now.  Another thing is that I will be ignoring my phone alot more this week here since I do not want to be bothered by some anyway at this point in time untill I get things straight in my mind again.  The nice thing about cell phones is that we all can turn them off and then some, and mine may land in the freezer yet for the week also.  With that being said I just may get things done for the week that I did not get done last week as normal.  It is an idea here and my Husband has the house phone anyway.  So now here since there is alot to get done most of it will be done on Monday here and I will be starting today after I get back from my walk here also for the day.  One thing about the walks is that I can get out of the house here totally and start thinking on things along with work on myself since apparently I am not fit according to some people anyway here in the area of course.  So I will take another long hard look on myself here in the next several weeks and see where I land up at.  I have noticed when I am streached thin and get told it is all my fault by some people along with being called names it is not a good thing on me at all.  So I will start as of today on the cheaper end of everything here and be done with it all.  That along with more walks here to get my mind straight after I noticed that there was traits of something else that was going on 4 years ago here also.  I should have not even have been driving at all in the past 2 weeks here and did anyway along with other things.  So either way I could not just stop and do nothing at all here since I would have been screamed at anyway and still got dropped on the curb for the past 2 weeks.  I am sorry that I am not like some truckers wives who ignore the house and make children clean and cook for me here along with staying on the phone constantly.  So now I am understanding more than what some even know in the whys here.  Yes granted the children need chores in the household but do not make the oldest clean everything plus have 3 other babes hooked to their hips because some are to lazy to get up to do and then ground them when they have something hidden for later on.  I have noticed that more and more here in where I am at totally in the Western NY area.  When my one niece moved in for a bit with myself and my Husband here she only had 2 loads of dishes to do, take out the trash when I could not do it, and her own laundry.  That was it she did not have to vac the place, shop, other laundry, nor think of to be cleaning cages along with feeding the feathers,dog, and cat out at all.  So now at this time I will say that my kids did have chores when they were young and it was just enough to say that they did something in the household at the time.  Now all I can do is shake my head on alot of things along with keeping my mouth shut also after in what was said to me several weeks ago along with this past week here from some also.