Now I know

Well things have been popping up in the past few days around here totally and the signs are there yet again for some of us.  Now I have been asking for my one Niece to come over so I can teach her in how to cook and some have been stone walling me for this part.  After all said and done I got several texts over the phone and some said that she got stuck with her baby brother all of the time.  That is when the red flag went up for me again around here since it happened to me years ago around the trailer with the older bunch.  With that said years ago some parents were dumping their kids on me for 5 days at a time and I did not question it at the time at all since both were working long hours at the time and so was I.  Working at a fast food joint between 40-60 a week and having the 3 girls on top of it all at the time.  Now at this point it was the day that I got married to my Husband and I had the girls the mother told me oh it is only for about an hour for you to watch them and I will be back.  After 3 hours and myself threatening to call CPS and walk out the door because my Husband and I had to go at the time she came back with in a half an hour mad.  Then and there I knew something was up totally and could not place my finger on it at all at the time.  Within about 3 months I was in for knee surgery also and the girls were not over at my place all of the time by then and I got blamed for knowing what I did not know.  Since I could hardly move at the time the girls father came in and the blame started and then I got asked if I know anything about his wife running around on him since I was babysitting their kids at the time.  My answer was that I did not know about it and all I knew was that I had the girls an awfull lot at the time.  I would not lie at all about something like that.  Also it hit me last night in what was said in passing and what one of the girls told me also thru the texts that were sent.  So alot of the red flags went up as of yesterday and it did not take long to start seeing what is going on.  Now to call and say what is on my mind here and be done with it all.  And I know it is better to do it all in person about the red flags that are going up.  Now after the other surgery that I have had and have had time to think on alot of the things here I have put it all togeather and the red flags have been up for the past year.  I was asking for a year for the girl for once a week to teach her how to cook so she does not burn things at all anymore and the real world cooking is better than what is taught in the school system here in NY State.  So now at this time I am thinking that it is mainly Guilt with some and that she knows that the red flags are totally up with me after what has happened in the past around here with me.  So now at this point in time there are other things that have went on and I will say this as in standing in a funeral parlor and I am holding up 2 of the girls that I have sat for from totally breaking down and the oldest girl was going thru it also and went to my Husband to cry on while I had her sisters.  As I said it is all clicking totally now in whats up and going on and the signs have not changed at all from before.  Or maybe I am just seeing them better at this point in time after things were done to me.