Shaking my head

Well now some know that I have been cheap for all of these years for a reason around here totally after I left Illinois.  The person could not believe that I had pulled out the cheap/frugal card for this long at all for the last 18 years at all now and they now know.  When I can pull up to about 200 dollars into another account to save up for things and for when we are really broke in about 2 months out of the year I must be doing something around the household weather I was at the trailer or in the house here either way now.  I guess this is why I have been really thinking on ways to cut down on the budget even more for the house here in the past 11 months and got the fact going in my mind totally.  And some were right tonight when they said I grew up in the St. Louis area also and no wander I have came up swinging hard as of late also on being that much cheaper.  With that said I know when I have lost a battle and can care less at this point in time now.  I have had to give on some things around the place and now I am totally done.  This will be the last time I will be in the Illinois area and some better get use to the fact on that one here.  Also I got asked again to go to a high school reunion and I again told the person Hell No I ain't coming period again tonight.  IF I run into the person while I am there this go around I will tell her face to face in how I feel and that is it at this point in time now.  Some will never know in what it is like being married to a Truck Driver at all and never will since she married a Doctor and never had to struggle at all at times of the year.  The last time I seen the person I said hi to be nice and asked how the person was doing and got told tough and you are not a friend of mine period and that was 6 years ago.  I laughed at the person and walked away totally from them.  So now at this point I am going down one last time to get what I asked for and to pick some brains on recipes from them and will come back to NY State after that and not look back.  I have also found out that I have done things the easy way for myself and nobody can hang that part over my head at all at this point in time.  So now I will continue to be cheaper than snot around here to support my household and go from there.  I have no choice at this point in time.  Since some have not figured it out at all in what I do here it is for the best at this point in time also.  Even if they did they would not like in what I have to do to keep the place afloat within the month at all.  Or maybe the math came easy to me here to make the house work, I am not sure as of yet.  So now at this point in time I am just wandering now in how some people have really made it and some of us others have had to really struggle totally all of these years to make it in the world.