Realizeing now

Now I know why I really wanted to get out of the park to begin with either way.  I have a feeling that 34 has been either totally thrown out of school or he refuses to go back one.  Well if you don't want to go to school guess what then it is time to work someplace then is my motto around here.  Not only that at 16 granted you can leave the children home alone.  When the boy can not even take a shower without being told there is a huge problem then.  Well I know why that the music went down "Daddy" just got home.  All I can say is a double duty shock collar works for the boy in 34.  I know almost everything is off still in my place without a problem except for the computer around here.  So as I sit here and hoping for total silence once again so I can really think of how to get things done and go cheaper around here at once.  Then wander if I can get a new place either way so I can get out of the trailer park and get my Niece out of here also.  It makes me wander in if I am doing the right thing at times by going that much cheaper for the place also.  What I meant by it is why bother half the time to have the T.V. totally off and afew other things around here also.  I refuse to join in on the foolishness of some freak person because that is what they all want.  And since I am keeping my nose out of alot of things, always have around here anyway and why bother to call when the town clowns do squat around here.  So I am totally stuck on alot of things that are going down around here.  It seems weird that I am ready and willing to get out of the scummy trailer park also.  Not that I mind where the trailer is at since I can walk every place and everything is near I just can't stand some of the neighbors is all.  Plus the rent is as much as a mortgage anyway.  Or maybe I am doing the cheap thing for no reason at all since I can't seem to get the flip out of here and I am stuck untill whenever.  Well now I know why I feel like I do just got a phone call from my Husband and it is eather get another 5 grand or statements that we pay the bills on time.  Now with that being said my Hubby poped off with if I was 50 grand in debt then you would give me a loan without a problem at all and that is what is wrong with the U S today.  And it is true great exsample is my cousin is about 45 grand in debt and she got a 110 grand loan for a house.  Now figure it all out.  Here I am streaching everything out around here and being a total tight wad and can't get squat at all for a loan.  That is why I am just down in the dumps as of late along with not being able to work at all yet becuase of the accident.  So now I will be thinking of ways to get cheaper around here so I can make this all work as normal.  Eather way I have to do somethings around here that some people will not like me for what so ever from today on of course.  Yes I am totally stressed out while I am at it all.  To give some details out of why always helps out.  So from now on the power strips will be turned off during the day around here and the dryer will not be used at all anymore here so I can save on that bill here in the can.  I will come up with lots of ways to start doing once again and get everything back into shape and my toush into high gear on alot of things here.  And yes I will quit smokeing here this week.  As soon as I run out then I am done.  There will be changes around here eather way.  Now with that being said alot of things will be off from now on and I will go out and get another drying rack for the can here today.  Then I can hang more laundery up here when the weather turns cruddy also.  That is the bad thing of always trying to save money around the household.  So no to get some things done and over with here and see what I can get into also while I am at it all pluss get dinner made.