Going thru

I am going thru alot of personal battels today. Even though I got 2 feet cut off my head this morning. My headache has cleared up now to try to turn off other things at randome while I am at it all. I have forgot how to do this since after 25 years of being able to turn things off at random also. The coming up swinging has worked to some degree of things but not all togeather in others at all. Yes I still have wacked out dreams at times and lastnight was the norm for them all. My "real mother" blamed herself for it and I coulden't say it was totally her at the moment and refuse to still at this point in time. Then again we were never close in the later years anyway from when I was 16 on. So since I have been battleing a few things over the past few months around here once again I know what to do and how to do it all also. I just figured it was a stage that I was going thru again untill I seen my Mother in Law again while I was sitting at my computer desk reading. I knew the smile was for me trying to bring the one side of the family togeather again and I failed and fell flat on my face or my Ass one. Take the pick on trying to do right around here with myself. After adopting another Quaker parrot around here I finally realized in why some pretty much depended on thier birds eather way they went. I have went back to my fur balls and feather balls for alot of things even though I have to watch the tape recorders. That is with the feather balls around here. I keep to myself and alot of folks know this around here in the trailer park also. Maybe the Issolation will do some good with me also wonce I talk to my Husband on the matter. If the offer still stands around us and another couple that we know. I will say that if and when we move out of the trailer park that someone won't keep thier mouth shut of where we moved to here in NY State. Pluss where I am thinking of it is closer to my Aunt and Uncle in PA also. Now I have read and heard alot of folks say that thier spouses work in PA and shop thier when they all get the chance to also. Or maybe I have been stuck in the same spot for way to long from an ungreatfull person who doesen't give a rats behind also once I think about it. DO not get me wrong on my Husband at all. This is one of the more stable spots I have been in besides knowing the woman who raised me kept the same spot also. The fact is that some passed up a spot that was normal to some point and totally saine while we were at it all. Pluss I diden't turn blue after almost 17 years while I was at it all. I have hated most of the 17 years that I have been here and came to the fact a few years ago that wait a minute I can walk to places here without a problem also and that is what made it tolerable. The front door to Walmart is 3 min away if that and about a 20 min walk to other places depending on how fast I walk also. And on the mood I am in at the time. Another good thing is that the wheel bags have saved me more times than not around here also. Now with some things I do let my Hubby take the van to work and refuse to worry about it at this point. Since I do have my own 2 feet and they seem to be fine after this long in time.