Now to sit here for awhile

Well I came from the doctors office and I said what to do for someone today.  The poor girl does not even have any fight left in her at all.  I remember the warfare that I went thru with my ex husband and it was not pretty at all.  Maybe I was and still am the scrapper and refuse to deal with alot of the abuse now.  That is part of why I threw out my Niece also out of the trailer since I was nothing but a piece of crap to her.  There is only so much I will take and having to clean up the mess that the girl left behind all of the time did not help out matters at all.  So yes I do understand alot more than what some people give me credit for.  I try to treat everyone with the up most respect either way until it gets to bad and I refuse to deal with lies and being treated like crap anymore.  Just like with an old neighbor she swore that I always did sleep with her boyfriends and never did.  I did not want her used goods at all.  So yes I know where some got that from totally and my Husband knew different at all times in what I did not do and to what I did do.  With the last about 6 months to a year I hardly went out of the trailer.  I went out for doctors appointments and did what I had to do after the appointments while I was still out.  That was what was getting to alot of people in the trailer park also.  So now to say the least I still get out every so often and I do what I did while I was in the trailer go after doctors appointments to do what I had to do.  Now I hardly go to any stores at all except once a month and it helps out around here.  As I tell some folks I still work it is a different kind of work in what I do now.  Just because of the accident does not mean that I can not do the housework and other things at all.  Some agree with me on that part of it all.  Plus it takes work to try to be on the cheap/frugal side anyway.  I know that some folks have dumped me to the curb around town and that is ok by me at this point in time.  Since I have told the complainers no alittle over a month ago they only have called me once to see how I was doing and did not ask for money nor smokes from me at all.  And yes the last time they asked for smokes I did pull the money back and still told them no.  With alot of things that were going on and alot of stress that was not needed at all on top of everything between 2 places some wander why I did get nasty with my attitude and I can break it out yet again.  Then some wandered why I kept saying no all of the time on borrowing from me.  As I have told the complainers that I do have a strict budget in place and it does not mean that you can barrow money off of some of us all of the time since you can not handle your own finances at your place.  Since the complainers get food stamps even it makes me wander in what they really do with the rest of their money.  So now I will think about that and go from there for the next 100 years.  When I can say that I about know where every penny goes in my place then there is a problem.  Just like when I get out to the stores once a month I know about what I want for dinner almost every night around here and that is why I come out cheaper in the stores.  During the week granted I eat alot of soups and leftovers also while my Husband is not here.  Another thing is that I do plan out some things that I can control here.  The meals are one thing that I can control and others do not seem to understand this at all.  With that being said I do not have an extra 250 coming into the household for food off of the food stamps at all so I am carefull in what I spend the money on for the both kitchens.  So I tend to get bags of flour to off set things here in the household and make alot of things from scratch.  I told a friend just this week that I do alot of things on the cheap and he did not blame me in the least bit at all.  Since I can not work hardly at all I have found ways to get food into the household and do it all cheaper than snot along with other things for the place.